Month: June 2022

So Many Stages of Anger

Friday, June 10, 2022

Many Things Are Best Left With the Setting Sun

Proverbs 15:1

A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Ephesians 4:26-27

Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not make room for the devil.

Words of Grace For Today

Anger is many things. Actually we use the word anger to mean many different things often not realizing that we are talking about different things. It makes conversations about anger difficult.

Anger can mean 1) the emotion we have when we are hurt by another person. It is not properly anger, but the precursor to anger. We may or may not know by whom, or what it is that hurts. It’s just the hurt is known (or thought to be known) to be caused by another person. Our emotion is the hurt of being done poorly to by another person. This is purely an emotion. It cannot be avoided. If we deny the emotion it will grow on it’s own. We can (sometimes) pause our further response, let the emotion settle (sometimes counting to 90 works, by which time the emotion will subside – if it does not re-fire from a repeat of a hurt, or some replaying of the hurt as if it were real again). When the emotion has settle we are able to rationally choose how to respond to the hurtful event.

If course we can feed the hurt and it will grow into anger proper:

Anger can mean 2) the emotion we allow hurt to develop into when we do not let it settle. This happens in increments. A slight intensification is that we identify who did us the hurt and we focus our hurt back on them as resentment which loops back on us as more hurt, until the hurt is so great it is anger. We are mad or angry at another person.

Anger can mean 3) the emotion of being angry at a person to being obsessed or overwhelmed with the hurt that this particular person has done us. We want to strike back, not that we will or have, but that we want to ‘get even’ as if that would sooth our own hurt. It will not. But that is the illogic of being hurt and letting it grow to overwhelm us so that it ‘needs’ resolution.

Finally anger can mean 4) an emotion that is past anger, more correctly referred to as rage. We become consumed by the irrational need to ‘get even.’ This feeds on itself until we somehow find a release. Out of rage come acts of revenge. Rage is beyond thinking about ‘getting even’ or even thinking. It is the motivation for irrational acts that will damage the other. The problem is all too often we misidentify the person who hurt us in the first place, and secondly no act of revenge can ever relieve our pain. It can only lead to a false sense of self-righteousness about planning and maybe carrying out an unjustifiable act of hurting another person.

This act of revenge can be limited to words, spoken or written, or it can involve physical acts of violence against the other person.

If we allow hurt to grow into anger and anger to intensify, and then to overwhelm us as rage there is little that can be done to stop it. Best is to stop it while we can. It’s not likely we can stop it later on from growing into acts of revenge. We ought not let the sun set on our hurt-anger. It only takes 90 seconds to let that emotion to dissipate.

Out anger, when acted out in acts of revenge start the hurt-angry cycle for others, often not even the person(s) who hurt us in the first place.

Being hurt is not avoidable, but the rest really is.

Words to the wise: Learn to speak soft words to oneself when one is hurt, so that the hurt is taken in stride. Learn to speak soft words to others so that their hurt (whether it really is caused by us or not) does not grow into anger towards us.

Life is full of hurt.

Life has more than it’s fair share of anger coming and going for all of us.

Life can be miserable if we seek revenge as a way to resolve our hurt that has festered into rage.

Rage never brings peace. It creates more hurt in us and in others.

We can choose to wait 90 seconds and then rationally respond to hurt. Best to stop hurt before it grows into anger.

Simple wisdom.

Hard to live.

Every day is an opportunity to practice choosing how we respond until it becomes second nature to let hurt dissipate. That’s the beginning of finding peace with a world that does not seem to want us to know peace

Oh, Were It So Simple …

Thursday, June 9, 2022

By Grace We See Wonders Upon Wonders

Each Day.

By Grace Each Day God Has Mercy on Us.

Genesis 4:7

If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin is lurking at the door; its desire is for you, but you must master it.

Galatians 5:1

For freedom Christ has set us free. Stand firm, therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.

Words of Grace For Today

Ah, were it so simple, that we could just stand firm and not submit to the yoke of slavery (to sin) or that we could do well and be accepted by God!

It is not so. Simple it would be, but if it were so simple we would all be lost forever, so good thing it is not simple that way!

All depends on grace.

God’s freely giving us everything we need for life, and not just subsistence or wealth distracted life, but rather life abundant.

We can only beg.

So we pray each day, God save us, God forgive us, God renew us and restore us, God make us instruments of your love for all creation.

Then we get to work doing all we can, knowing

1. we will fail to always choose to love

2. the Holy Spirit inspire us, and motivate us, and move us to do what God needs us to do

and

3. all will be well.

It’s just another 24 hours of God giving us the free gift of life, love, and hope.

Breathe deeply

and get moving into the day!

Choose, Again!

Wednesday, June 8, 2022

The Spirit Guides Us

Each New Morning, Noon, and Night

To the Truth

Of God’s Love for Us

1 Samuel 2:7

The Lord makes poor and makes rich; he brings low, he also exalts.

James 2:1

My brothers and sisters, do you with your acts of favouritism really believe in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ?

Words of Grace For Today

While the rich continue to exert a ghastly disproportionate carbon footprint on the environment that everyone needs to sustain life …

While nepotism is exercised openly and in secret the world around usually as a means to ‘buy’ other people’s support and favour …

While last year’s extreme weather events become more normal this year (for every year of the previous decade it seems, and cumulatively so that this year’s normal is really extreme!) resulting in drought, floods, hurricanes, tornadoes, drechos, wildfires, ice storms, heat domes, and all kinds of rare weather events that challenge our way of living …

While so many people seek to be exalted in so many different ways, always at the cost of someone else’s basic living …

While today is a gift of 24 hours …

How do we choose to live?

We can jump right out there and compete with everyone in our way while we struggle to get all we want out of life (whatever that may be, and often we have no clue about what we are striving so hard for … even when we name it with words like money, honour, stability, security …).

Or

We can disengage and justify ourselves as living outside the way the world works, self-righteously declaring that we are and/or have it better than everyone else.

OR

We can listen to the Holy Spirit guiding us towards the Truth about us, life, and all creation. Often we say that people cannot bear all the Truth all at once, so we receive glimpses of it through our lives. That may be. Yet Truth is not that hard to come by and not that hard to grasp, if one is willing to face the implications. The implications are drastic to us who have ‘made our way up in the world.’ The Truth reveals that what we think we have accomplished is actually useless and futile. The Truth has less drastic implications for those who subsist. For them it offers what they have never had possible through their own efforts, life abundant. None of us can achieve it through our efforts, it’s that the poor have less opportunity to delude themselves into thinking they have or can achieve it.

The Truth is God created us, filled us with free will to choose to love, and when we choose to not love all of creation, God comes to forgive us, redeem us, renew us, and restore our freedom to choose to love … or to not love. God gives us a free gift, again and again, abundant life, filled with all the love and all the security that is possible on this good earth.

So how do we want to proceed through these next 24 hours?

Life abundant, or futile scrambling and struggling?

Every day God gives us the choice, again.

Striking Fear Into Our Hearts

Tuesday, June 7, 2022

Middle of the ‘Night’

and

The Sun Never Sets,

Our Evil Deeds

Are Never Hidden

From the Light of God

1 Samuel 12:20-21

Samuel said to the people, ‘Do not be afraid; you have done all this evil, yet do not turn aside from following the Lord, but serve the Lord with all your heart; and do not turn aside after useless things that cannot profit or save.’

John 12:26

Whoever serves me must follow me, and where I am, there will my servant be also. Whoever serves me, the Father will honour.

Words of Grace For Today

You have done all this evil!

That is usually preceded by a long list of horrendous things we have done, some are well known and many we have hidden so others would not find out about them, but then someone did. Everything eventually sees the light of day!

You have done all this evil!

That is usually followed by a stiff condemnation and a listing of the ways we will be punished, which hardly ever is exactly proportional to the horrendous things we have done. We would like to say that crime and evil do not pay, but they do. We would like to believe that innocent people are not punished for things they did not do, but there is more evil done punishing innocent people than the evil that innocent people are punished for. It’s just how we ‘get it out of our system’. We humans are always up for a good scapegoating to relieve the pent up pressure on our own guilty consciences. Girard had that right!

You have done all this evil!

Then Samuel plays out for the people God’s grace. There is no punishment list.

There is in the prior verses much more: Samuel, old in age, has come before ‘all of Israel’ and asked them to judge him if he is guilty of any offence, and they have declared that he is not guilty of anything.

Samuel goes on to recount their history, from their cries in Egypt that God answers by sending Moses and Aaron to bring them to the Promised Land, to their wayward worship of and serving other gods, Baal and Astartes, God’s punishments as foreign powers conquered them, and then their request for a king to lead them against their enemies. This is counted by all as a sin, one terrible sin on top of all the others.

Still Samuel tells them that all can be well: if both you and the king who reigns over you will follow the Lord your God, it will be well.

It’s not a simple day of reckoning for Samuel. The people are still called to account, so Samuel demonstrates God’s power: Is it not the wheat harvest today? I will call upon the Lord, that he may send thunder and rain; and you shall know and see that the wickedness that you have done in the sight of the Lord is great in demanding a king for yourselves.’ So Samuel called upon the Lord, and the Lord sent thunder and rain that day; and all the people greatly feared the Lord and Samuel.

The people, rightly notice God’s power and wrath against them and pray for their lives, not to God, but they ask Samuel to pray for them: All the people said to Samuel, ‘Pray to the Lord your God for your servants, so that we may not die; for we have added to all our sins the evil of demanding a king for ourselves.’

This is where the verse above fits. Samuel begins by telling them not to be afraid. He just struck the fear of God into their hearts and now he tells them not to be afraid. They should serve their God alone, and all will be well, if they and their king serve God alone. Samuel tells them God has an interest in them, so God will not too quickly kill off the sinful people for all their sins, the last being asking for a king to lead them against their enemies.

For the Lord will not cast away his people, for his great name’s sake, because it has pleased the Lord to make you a people for himself.

To their request that Samuel pray for them, Samuel puts it simply:

Moreover as for me, far be it from me that I should sin against the Lord by ceasing to pray for you; and I will instruct you in the good and the right way.

And what is that instruction, as if the passages have not been spilling it out in abundance: Only fear the Lord, and serve him faithfully with all your heart; for consider what great things he has done for you.

And it they do not, well then there will be, as they feared, the punishment that they already deserve: But if you still do wickedly, you shall be swept away, both you and your king.

So is God merciful?

Is Samuel right to strike the fear of God into their hearts with rain and thunder on their wheat crops?

…

The whole scenario plays out that we can avoid God’s wrath by serving God alone. Yet like the Israelis we turn from God in so many ways each day.

God does honour those who serve him.

Thankfully God is merciful to all people who ever lived and will ever live, for we have all at some time in some way turned from serving God alone. Scapegoating innocent people to relieve the conflict in our lives we have created is just one of the ongoing, horrendous sins that is our turning from our God, who has sent us the Spirit of truth, to guide us in all truth.

Ah, but we choose to hide our evil deeds, and our hearts from the truth, for we think we cannot bear the punishment that will follow.

Thankfully God is merciful to all.

Now for today: how can we choose to serve God alone! Well then … on with it!

Tape Measures and Sewer Content

Monday, June 6, 2022

There is No Tape Measure

for the Truly Marvellous Things in Life.

(or the least marvellous.)

1 Chronicles 28:9

My son Solomon, know the God of your father, and serve him with single mind and willing heart; for the Lord searches every mind, and understands every plan and thought. If you seek him, he will be found by you; but if you forsake him, he will abandon you for ever.

1 John 4:13

By this we know that we abide in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit.

Words of Grace For Today

Were we to measure our lives by any means dependent upon our own abilities, actions, thoughts, beliefs, intentions, or anything that is of us, we would come up with a fools result.

It’s like using a tape measure to figure out how much sewer the whole city of 2 million produces in a day. The tool is not up to the task of the things measured.

One thing we know is our own records are not far off from the sewer contents when it comes to being something we can boast of before God.

To measure our ‘success’ in life (as God might measure us) we simply need to admit we cannot. The only things we know about God and God’s measure of us is what the Holy Spirit gives us as gift. We cannot measure those gifts either. So we come up empty handed trying to measure our success before God.

We can only trust God (trust made possible by the gift given to us by the Spirit) that God does not forsake us, abandon us, or leave us to stand on our own, now in this life, or ever in eternity. God stands by us, walks with us, suffers with us, and does everything to convince us that all is well, all is well, and all manner of things are well, because (and only because) God is gracious with us.

Of course we would prefer to know that we can serve God with a single mind and a willing heart, and that we can seek and find God. That way we are in control of what happens to us and to the world around us. But that’s not how God created us to live. God designed us to live guided by love, grace, faith and hope; and none of that gives us the ability to judge our own ‘success’ in serving God with a single mind and a single heart. It certainly does not give us the ability to accurately judge others.

We try to judge ourselves and we love to judge others. It gives us a sense of control over our lives, control that is not ours to have.

We are only by grace able to live fully when we are guided by God’s love, faith, and hope. That will fill up any day we wish to give over to them, and then some.

Ready or not: Hang on to your hat, it’s another of God’s days for us.

Groaning

Sunday, June 5, 2022

Is this Your Lost Camper?

What’s It Doing In My Yard?

The VIN of the Lost/Stolen/Misplaced and Unlicensed Motor Home

Psalm 73:26

My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever.

Romans 8:23-24

Not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the first fruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly while we wait for adoption, the redemption of our bodies. For in hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what is seen?

Words of Grace For Today

There is every cause to groan at the developments of the previous days …

besides the reasons of every day: death is a’coming as our bodies give up life; we may be adopted and redeemed, but our bodies still have so many demands and limits and … well life, as one gets older and older, does not seem to get better, in fact, quite the opposite. Our bodies are not the only things that wear out. Machines that we rely on do as well. While our bodies are covered under the provincial health care plan, and we may have supplementary insurance, our machines cost lots of money to have someone qualified fix them.

So our machines get cobbled back together again and again, and pretty soon it’s a marvel that they work at all.

Our bodies get health care, such as it is, if a doctor will even care at all about you. All of that costs lots of money that comes out of our pockets as taxes, supposedly more if we have and make more money, though it seems not to work out that way. Even with the best health care, though, our bodies still slowly and sometimes quite quickly decay as if pulled back to be dust.

We can rejoice that with all this decay, God is our strength and portion forever, and that even our bodies will be adopted fully and redeemed fully and renewed, better than in our first life. We wait. We wait for God to keep the promise that our bodies will be redeemed and renewed. There is no proof available that this redemption and renewal will happen. So much of what we observe and experience points in exactly the opposite direction. So we are given hope. Hope alone. Hope in what is not obvious or not seen or sometimes apparently simply not possible.

Hope is hope when it anticipates what is not seen or proven or provable.

God gives us plenty, even when in the previous days someone parks a 40 foot old motor home in my yard from across our campers where I live. This motor home has no license plate, is a mess inside as much as is obvious through the door’s window. It has all the signs of being stolen and dumped here, out of sight and in my way. The yard is used as a dumping ground.

Now that stupidity is a cause for so much groaning. When will it stop!

God gives us hope that even things like this will be resolved, since redeemed is a bit much to hope for.